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Russell, George William Erskine, 1853-1919

"Sydney Smith"

.. It is impossible to
contradict a gentleman who has been in the forests of Cayenne; but we
are determined, as soon as a Campanero is brought to England, to make
him toll in a public place, and have the distance measured.
"The Toucan has an enormous bill, makes a noise like a puppy dog, and
lays his eggs in hollow trees. How astonishing are the freaks and
fancies of nature! To what purpose, we say, is a bird placed in the
woods of Cayenne with a bill a yard long, making a noise like a puppy
dog, and laying eggs in hollow trees? The Toucans, to be sure, might
retort, to what purpose were gentlemen in Bond Street created? To what
purpose were certain foolish prating Members of Parliament
created?--pestering the House of Commons with their ignorance and
folly, and impeding the business of the country? There is no end of
such questions. So we will not enter into the metaphysics of the
Toucan.
"The Sloth, in its wild state, spends its life in trees, and never
leaves them but from force or accident. The eagle to the sky, the mole
to the ground, the sloth to the tree; but what is most extraordinary,
he lives not _upon_ the branches, but _under_ them. He moves
suspended, rests suspended, sleeps suspended, and passes his life in
suspense--like a young clergyman distantly related to a bishop.


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