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Ferber, Edna, 1885-1968

"Fanny Herself"

All through Germany, for that matter. In Bavaria
it's bitter. That's one reason why Olga loathed Munich so.
The queer part of it is that all that opposition seemed to
fan something in me; something that had been smoldering for
a long time." His voice had lost its dull tone now. It had
in it a new timbre. And as he talked he began to interlard
his English with bits of German, the language to which his
tongue had accustomed itself in the past ten years. His
sentences, too, took on a German construction, from time to
time. He was plainly excited now. "My playing began
to improve. There would be a ghastly scene with Olga--
sickening--degrading. Then I would go to my work, and I
would play, but magnificently! I tell you, it would be
playing. I know. To fool myself I know better. One
morning, after a dreadful quarrel I got the idea for the
concerto, and the psalms. Jewish music. As Jewish as the
Kol Nidre. I wanted to express the passion, and fire, and
history of a people. My people. Why was that? Tell me.
Selbst, weiss ich nicht.


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