I went so far as to say that I didn't see
how she could dislike me. And I said: 'I ask you to marry me. It will
only be for a year or two, but that year or two are all my life, while
only a fraction of yours. I am rich, and after my death you will be
rich, and free from the necessity of this daily drudgery of yours. But I
don't ask you to marry me for money; I ask you to marry me out of pity.
I ask you, out of kindness to the most unfortunate and hopeless man in
the world, to give me a trifle out of your existence. Merely out of
pity; merely because it is a woman's part in the world to render pity
and balm. I won't hide anything from you. There will be the unpleasant
business of my sudden death, which will be a shock to you, even if you
learn to hate me. But you would get over that. And you would always
afterwards have the consciousness of having changed the last months of a
man's career from hell to heaven. There's no disguising the fact that
it's a strange proposition I'm making to you, but the proposition is not
more strange than the situation. Will you consent, or won't you?' She
was going to say something, but I stopped her. I said: 'Wait a moment. I
shan't try to terrorize you by threats of suicide. And now, before you
say "Yes" or "No," I give you my solemn word not to commit suicide if
you say "No.
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