I.
You see everybody in our town was running around, getting fat jobs
and positions, and picking up a million dollars or so,
So I felt it incumbent on me
To shake myself up, and see if there wasn't a good butter firkin, well
filled, loafing around idle, in which could conveniently locate my
centre of gravity, and so I said to myself, I'll go
To Washington and see,
Says ICHABOD BOGGS, says I.
II.
Now, don't you see, you might just as well ask for a big position at
first, and then take what you can get,
At least that has been my rule so far,
For, as I says to myself, if you can only get a very high position, with
a sort of nabob's salary, and lots of perquisites running in
annually, you needn't do anything, you bet,
But puff at your cigar,
Says ICHABOD BOGGS, says I.
III.
So I put on my best clothes, and a sort of a big blue necktie,
and shortly thereafter showed myself to Mr. GRANT,
And said that there had been quite enough
Of this giving away big offices to people who hadn't big reputations,
and that he had other fish to fry, and that, as he wouldn't give the
Custom House to my son, I'd take it myself, and then I stopped,
and he looked, "I shan't,"
But all he said was--puff,
Says General GRANT, says he.
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