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Ford, Sewell, 1868-1946

"Wilt Thou Torchy"

"
"Vee!" says I, startin' to dash around the table.
"Hush!" says she, wavin' me hack. "Here come your eggs."
Say, what went on durin' the rest of the day I couldn't tell. I expect
it was a good deal the same kind of an afternoon we'd been havin' right
along, but to me it was three X double A with the band playin'. I was
light in the head and I had springs in my heels. Everything and
everybody looked good to me.
I jollied Old Hickory into lettin' me tip the sailors that had lugged
the sacks aboard, and I threw in some of his best cigars just by way of
relievin' my feelin's. Whenever I passed Captain Rupert Killam I
hammered him on the back folksy and told him he sure was some
discoverer. I even let Mrs. Mumford feed me an earful about how the
late dear Mr. Mumford always remembered to send home a bunch of roses
on their weddin' anniversary. Rather than revisit the scene himself, I
suppose.
But when it come to playin' opposite Auntie--say, I was right there
with the Percy-boy stuff: givin' her a hand up the stairs when she came
on deck, leadin' her to a chair on the shady side, and hintin' how she
looked mighty chipper after an all-night session such as we'd had.
Talk about smooth stuff! I had the inside of a banana peel lookin'
like a nutmeg grater.


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