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Ford, Sewell, 1868-1946

"Wilt Thou Torchy"


"Go away, fellow!" remarks Dudley.
"Snake in the grass!" says Rupert.
Then they clinched and begun rollin' over on the deck, clawin' each
other. Course, Mrs. Mumford lets out a few frantic squeals and slumps
in a faint. Professor Leonidas Barr starts wringin' his hands and
groaning "Oh, dear! Oh, dear, dear!" Auntie, she just stands there
gaspin' and tryin' to unlimber her lorgnette.
As for Old Hickory, he watches the proceedings breathless for a second
or so before he can make out what's happenin'. Then he roars:
"Hey, stop 'em, somebody! Stop 'em, I say!"
That listened to me like my cue, and while I've never been strong for
mixin' in a muss, I jumped into this one lively. And between me and
the deck steward haulin' one way, and Meyers and Mr. Ellins pullin' the
other, we finally pries 'em apart, breathin' hard and glarin' menacin'.
"Now, in the name of Mars," demands Old Hickory, "what the sulphuretted
syntax is this all about? Come, Captain Killam, you started this; tell
us why."
"He--he's a traitor, that's why!" pants Rupert, pointin' at Dudley.
"Bah!" says Old Hickory. "Whaddye mean, traitor?"
"He's plotting to send confederates to Nunca Secos Key before we get
there," says Rupert. "Plotting to steal our buried treasure.


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