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Various

"Volume 14, No. 385, August 15, 1829"

How yonder bridegroom, just cemented
in an alliance that will not last out his lease of life, "spick and
span new," all eyes, and a double row of buttons ornamenting his
latticed waistcoat, looks at his adored opposite, who holds her
Venetian parasol--sun shade--before her face, glowing like a red brick
wall in the sun. Ah! his regards are attracted by a modest little
nymph of the grove, seated snugly in a sylvan recess, her pretty white
cheeks peeping out beneath the tresses of honeysuckle and woodbine
that veil her beauty. Well, _railing_ is in this case allowable, for
see that brazen front of maiden sixty, guiltless of curls, with a huge
structure of bonnet cocked straight at the top of her head, like the
roof of a market-house, and her broad, square skirts of faded green,
deformed by formal knots of yew and holly. Look with what a blushless
face of triumph she eyes her poor tottering neighbour opposite, who
never appears destined "to suffer a recovery." Oh, 'tis remorseless!
But look down that vista of charity children in slate coloured Quaker
bonnets, stuck one against the other in drab, like pins in a paper,
but not so bright; are they going to stand there for ever, with their
governess at their head, looking as smug and fubsy as the squat house
at the end? Why 'tis--street!--Look at the pump at the other end, that
might pass for an abridgment of a parish clerk--and see, there comes
stalking across the Green the parish beadle, with a great white
placard in his hat--you might well mistake him for Alderman ----'s
monument in red brick with the marble tablet on the top of it.


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