]
* * * * *
[Illustration: _First Tommy_ (_in lorry_). "YOU'VE STOOD THERE
WATCHING US LONG ENOUGH. I SUPPOSE YOU FIND US INTERESTING?"
_Second Tommy_. "NOA. A WUR JUST THINKIN' O' WHEN T' PUNCH AND JUDY
SHOW USED TO COOM TO OORR VILLAGE."]
* * * * *
THE WATCH DOGS.
LXVII.
MY DEAR CHARLES,--In the little village I'm thinking of it is a sight
on no account to be missed to see the same old British Tommy shopping
by telepathy. He doesn't speak their language and they don't speak
his, and when the article required is not in the window or on the
counter to be indicated by the thumb, a deadlock would appear to be
inevitable. Our Master Thomas, however, never did realise what a
deadlock is; he goes on till he gets what he wants. So you see them in
pairs, taking up a stolid position at the counter, obstinately stating
and re-stating their demands in a composite language of which the
foreign element is almost negligible, until the merchant or his wife
gives in and produces the article required. I know one simple soldier
who managed to reconcile himself to the confirmed habit amongst the
French people of addressing each other in the French language, but
could never understand their addressing horses and dogs in such an
unintelligible tongue. "If you want a dog to come 'ere, why not say
'Come 'ere!' and 'ave done with it?" Men may learn strange lingoes to
humour their fellow-men, but how can any dog be expected to understand
"_Viens ici_"?
Three years and some odd months have not changed this point of view;
and now for Thomas to find himself in Italy is only to discover
another lot of unfortunate people who cannot understand or make
themselves understood.
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